From the moment that Joel Stein sees the small smudge on his
wife’s sonogram, signaling that they are going to have a boy, he is thrown into
a panic attack of epic proportions. In reaction to this, and much to his
credit, the author sets out to find what it really means to be “a man.” He is
not alone in his insecurities about his own manhood. Many men, myself included,
have gone to great lengths to discover the true meaning of term, and come up
with some surprising conclusions.
In a most entertaining style, Mr. Stein recounts his own
insecurities, and then comes up with a novel idea. He will confront his
self-doubts by becoming all of the things he thinks he is not. So, accordingly, he begins his journey into
perceived “manhood”, by joining the Boy Scouts for an overnight camping trip;
doing a stint of duty as a firefighter; and training with Major League Baseball
Star Shawn Green. In addition to these testosterone laden exploits, he manages
to find the time to take on Ultimate Fighting Champion Randy Couture; joining a
stock firm as a day trader; and also doing some time in Boot Camp for three
days with the Army. These are only some of the exploits which the author
undertakes in his misguided quest for “manhood.”
For the record, the Fire Captain tells him via e-mail, prior
to his tour with the firefighters, “Not to dismiss your entire premise, but
none of the activities or skills you plan on doing define becoming a man. A man
is honest, kind, and courageous, protects women, is humble, bold, moral, seeks
truth, loves children, and fights for what is right.”
While battling to convince himself that he is truly “a man”,
he also recounts some humorous adventures with his feminist leaning wife, and
explores the societal roots of what we have come to think of as “manhood.” All
of this results in a highly readable and entertaining book, which in some ways
mirror my own self-doubts as a young man. Indeed, one of the reasons I joined
the Navy many years ago mirror the authors own perceptions of himself as being “less
than a man.” Some of those doubts can be attributed to a lack of talent in
sports, or the lack of a bond formed with one’s father. I can identify with
those facets of Mr. Stein’s thoughts.
This book works on so many levels; humor, self-analysis, and
introspection all combine in the author’s vibrant and creative style, to bring
us face to face with just what it takes to be a man in today’s world. And when
all is said and done, this is a very entertaining, and uplifting book.