My Father's Army Wallet

My father was a towering figure to me when I was a small fry. My perception of him changed over the years as I grew older; circumstances and reality ultimately prevailing. But when I was about 5 years old this pigskin wallet; which my father carried for 3 years while serving out his time at Fort Dix during the Korean War waiting for a Hardship Discharge; was to me the epitome of manhood. It was kept in his dresser drawer. As far as I was concerned, if only I could be a grown man and have a wallet like that I would never want for anything else in the way of self-esteem. The wallet was always promised to me. It was to be mine “when I grew up.”

So, when my father passed away in December of 2001 I came into possession of this treasured and revered shrine. I received it by mail from my father’s second wife; he remarried after my mother’s death in 1984. She was a loving companion to him for 16 years until he passed away, and I appreciated the gesture honoring this age old pact concerning the wallet.

Some things never live up to the memories attached thereof; but not so with this wallet. Rather, it contained all that I had remembered; plus some unexpected surprises, all of which left me even more confused than I already was about my relationship with my father; which, to say the least, was strained. In fact we had not spoken for almost a decade before he died. We never made that transition and put the past behind us. Neither one of us was capable of taking the first step towards reconciliation, I suppose, but that’s the truth. And that lack of a reconciliation made this wallet even more important. It serves as the only real "link" to my father.

Now, holding the wallet in my hand for the first time in over 40 years; since 1969 give or take; I opened the shrine and relived the excitement of being a child again, looking into my father’s world. The problem was, now I was older than he was when he had promised the wallet to me. Maybe this was going to be anti-climactic as the wallet had been in his dresser drawer for decades since I’d last seen it. So, I thought,what could be new?

Apparently; along with all of the things I remembered as having been in the wallet; my father had been adding stuff to it since I’d seen it last. I remember the Reserve ID card; I now even have one myself; and the crucifix and the penny were always like Sacred Relics to me. The crucifix comes from the Shrine of the Little Flower in Oak Park, Michigan. It was a gift to my father from his older brother Roy, who had served in the Navy during the Second World War. He used to go around the country while on leave, visiting all of the Catholic Shrines. The penny; dated 1950, the year in which my parents were wed; is the one my Mom carried in her shoe on their wedding day. I know this story to be true because I used to hold it in my hand and ask her about it. I never got tired of hearing that story.  

There are other things in the wallet which I remember well; the draft status cards, which run from 5-A to 3-R. The first indicates that he was eligible to be called for Korea, while the second one shows he is no longer available. There were also a few things which my Dad had added to the wallet; things which I found puzzling; given the nature of our non-relationship.

The first was an old Buffalo nickel with his birth year on it; 1931. I’d sent that to him in 1981 for his 50^th birthday. At the time I was already out of the Navy and working for Military Sealift Command. We were so polarized that I never even stayed with my parents when in New York; about once or twice a year. Instead I stayed with my friends Mark and Lois in Belle Harbor. But yet I still sent the old man a birthday gift; one which he obviously treasured, though he never said a word to me about it. I had even wondered if he ever received it; but never asked. Finding that nickel was quite a surprise for me; did he keep it because I’d sent it? Or was it simply because it was a nickel? 

But the real showstopper was this letter; the contents of which were not extraordinary in any way; I had written many letters home which far outdid this one. It was one of the few not addressed to my Mom and maybe that’s why he kept it. I’ll never know. We hadn’t spoken to one another in a civil manner for years before we finally broke off contact altogether in the early 1990’s. The one exception was when he called to tell me that Nana; my grandmother; had passed away. He said he was calling out of obligation. I thanked him and we hung up. I never saw or spoke to him again after that.

Time is a funny thing. Sometimes we forgive; and maybe even forget. I don’t know whether or not I will ever reach that point in connection with my relationship to my father. It’s simply too complicated. Besides, he’s gone and the conversation would be kind of one sided. But I have to believe he must have liked something about me. Or else why would he have carried that letter?

Shrine of the Sacred Flower

This is the Shrine of the Little Flower, located in Royal Oak Michigan. I first became aware of this shrine when looking through the contents of my father’s army wallet, which I wrote about a few days ago. Realizing that I knew very little about the place I decided to look on line to see what I could find out. As always, I’m glad I did.

Catholic Shrines have always been of interest to me. Although I am Jewish, my father was Catholic; as in Irish Catholic. It was Latin and incense, blood and body of Christ; and no meat on Friday’s until the Pope said it was okay in the 1960’s. I even went to church with him until I was about 6 years old. I found it spooky; all in Latin and dark with the nuns wearing their wimples. But I have always been fascinated with the Shrines; as they usually represent some interesting story, and even; in some cases; a miracle. That interest is what sparked me to find out about this particular Shrine.

The National Shrine of the Little Flower Catholic Church is a Roman Catholic National Shrine, as well as a functioning church. It was built in two stages between 1931 and 1936. It serves as an active parish of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Detroit. Father Charles Coughlin; the controversial evangelistic preacher; helped to fund it. He even broadcast some of his programs from the tower during the 1930's.

The shrine itself was erected in honor of Saint Thérèse de Lisieux ; also known as the Little Flower. The church was built in 1926. The area was largely Protestant and within about two weeks after it opened the Ku Klux Klan burned a cross in front of the church. The original wood structure was destroyed by a fire in March of 1936. The construction of a new church was already underway; having  begun in 1931; with the entire project completed by 1936, shortly after the fire.

The large limestone Art Deco tower is known as the Charity Crucifixion Tower. It was completed in 1931 and has sculptures by Rene Paul Chambellan, including one of Christ on the Woodward Avenue façade. It was built as a response to the Ku Klux Klan as a "cross they could not burn." Pretty cool, huh?

The sides and rear of the building contain a crucifix which can be lit from the inside. The upper four corners of the structure are representations of the Four Evangelists, and carved below the feet of the figure of Christ are the Seven Last Words. Just below that is a doorway with "Charity" and "Christ Crucified" carved above it. On the sides of the doorframe are depictions of items associated with the Passion.”  This doorway leads to a balcony resembling a pulpit. It is carved with depictions the Archangels Jophiel, Raphael, Michael, Gabriel and Uriel. And, across the terrace facing the crucifix there is a depiction of Saint Thérèse of Lisieux is carved into the wall. This sculpture is also by Chambellan.

As for the Little Flower herself, well she was in reality Marie-Françoise-Thérèse Martin, born on January 2, 1873. She was a French Discalced Carmelite nun from the age of 15 until her death 9 years later from tuberculosis at the age of 24. She is popularly known as "The Little Flower of Jesus". She is also known as simply the “Little Flower”. In 1997 Pope John Paul II named her as a Doctor of the Church; the youngest so honored and only the 3^rd woman to hold that position. As a result her already wide following has increased.

What made her so revered were the volumes of poetry and writing she left behind. Her extreme ordinariness was the very quality which led to her writings becoming the basis for her eventual canonization in 1925. Her spirituality in the face of her illness is what she is revered for. Her feast day is October 1^st.

If you wonder why I am taking the time to find this out, it’s all just an extension of trying to understand my father; as well as get to know a bit more about Roy; pictured above at about the time he got the crucifix which he gave to my Dad. While I may not be able to make these journeys physically, through the wonders of technology I can walk the grounds and see where Roy once went and where he bought that crucifix. And the story about the Little Flower isn’t bad either…

Note: The above photo of Uncle Roy is courtesy of Aunt Gloria from the Williams Family Collection; which is housed in various drawers and photo albums across the land.