Indiana Religious Freedom Law - Why it's Different

It all started with Peyote. In 1993 Bill Clinton signed the Federal Religious Freedom Act to allow the Indians to use peyote in their religious ceremonies. Of course when the Rasta’s in Florida wanted their religious rights upheld to smoke marijuana in deference to their God, Ja, they were refused; but it all started with the peyote.

By 1998 it was becoming sort of a fashion to champion state laws protecting Religious Freedom; and as usual we now have a patchwork quilt of laws in different states; all of which are keeping the attorney’s very busy. Now, this past week, we have the Indiana law weighing in; supposedly in the name of religious freedom; and at this writing the Governor is demanding clarification of the law’s provisions to ensure his state is “gay friendly.”  It’s a shame that the reason he caved in was due to public pressure and not sound law; which the bill was not to begin with. We’ll get to that.

But first, why was this bill received by the public with such an immediate and decisive response? What’s different in this bill that is different from the 1993 Federal law; as well as the 2 dozen other states which have Religious Freedom Acts on the books?

Well, the first thing which struck me when I read it; I actually do that; was that Section 5, which purports to grant rights to Religious groups, actually makes it legal for an OPINION to be a valid reason to deny someone else the right to service.

The law takes great pains to define certain words in the bill; but nowhere does it define the term Religion; leaving the door open for an inability to determine anything in court. Under such vaguely written statute an opinion can be construed as a religion. This would actually make the Rasta’s quite happy, as they ritually; or religiously; smoke weed. It’s not just about wedding cakes. It works both ways, you see.

Additionally, this was the first law of its kind to target individuals as opposed to businesses. Section 11 of the bill actually abrogates your right as an individual to bring suit against an employer; thus making the State both the Legislature and the Judiciary. This is something we don’t do in America. The principles of Separation of Powers; and Conflict of Interests; is the backbone of Democratic Republican form of government.

I love using those two words together. It confuses some people. And it also shows the true divisive nature of our two party system. The very titles of the two parties immediately divide the populace. Democratic Party implies a Populace form of government; where the majority rules. That is not the case here. And the Republican Party smacks of nobility and privilege. Together the two keep us all at odds, and themselves in power.

The most common example in this whole Indiana thing has been the Baker. The Baker has rights. So do his customers. But the law says the Baker can’t discriminate against specific groups of people; in this case Gay and Lesbian couples. But the Bakery itself has rights which are only related to its operation. The Baker may choose to disassociate with Gays in his personal life; but as a Bakery, he is bound by Federal Law to serve all people. It’s very simple.

But here comes yet another Conservative politician; who all agree we have too many laws; passing another useless, and flawed law. So flawed, in fact, that at this writing the Governor of Indiana is demanding the Legislature rewrite the law to make  sure it is gay friendly by this Friday. We shall see.

Here is the link to the original 1993 Federal Law;

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religious_Freedom_Restoration_Act   

And here is the full text of Indiana’s “religious freedom” law. See if you can spot the difference and pay attention to Sections 5 and 11.

SENATE ENROLLED ACT No. 101

AN ACT to amend the Indiana Code concerning civil procedure.

Be it enacted by the General Assembly of the State of Indiana:

SECTION1.IC34-13-9 IS ADDED TO THE INDIANA CODE AS A NEW CHAPTER TO READ AS FOLLOWS [EFFECTIVE JULY 1, 2015]:

Chapter 9. Religious Freedom Restoration

Sec. 1. This chapter applies to all governmental entity statutes, ordinances, resolutions, executive or administrative orders, regulations, customs, and usages, including the implementation or application thereof, regardless of whether they were enacted, adopted, or initiated before, on, or after July 1, 2015.

Sec. 2. A governmental entity statute, ordinance, resolution, executive or administrative order, regulation, custom, or usage may not be construed to be exempt from the application of this chapter unless a state statute expressly exempts the statute, ordinance, resolution, executive or administrative order, regulation, custom, or usage from the application of this chapter by citation to this chapter.

Sec. 3. (a) The following definitions apply throughout this section: (1) "Establishment Clause" refers to the part of the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United States or the Constitution of the State of Indiana prohibiting laws respecting the establishment of religion. (2) "Granting", used with respect to government funding, benefits, or exemptions, does not include the denial of government funding, benefits, or exemptions. (b) This chapter may not be construed to affect, interpret, or in any way address the Establishment Clause. (c) Granting government funding, benefits, or exemptions, to the extent permissible under the Establishment Clause, does not constitute a violation of this chapter.

Sec. 4. As used in this chapter, "demonstrates"means meets the burdens of going forward with the evidence and of persuasion.

Sec. 5. As used in this chapter, "exercise of religion" includes any exercise of religion,whether or not compelled by, or central to, a system of religious belief.

Sec. 6. As used in this chapter, "governmental entity" includes the whole or any part of a branch, department, agency, instrumentality, official, or other individual or entity acting under color of law of any of the following: (1) State government. (2) A political subdivision (as defined in IC 36-1-2-13). (3) An instrumentality of a governmental entity described in subdivision(1) or (2), including a state educational institution, a body politic, a body corporate and politic, or any other similar entity established by law.

Sec. 7. As used in this chapter, "person" includes the following: (1) An individual. (2) An organization, a religious society, a church, a body of communicants, or a group organized and operated primarily for religious purposes. (3) A partnership, a limited liability company, a corporation, a company, a firm, a society, a joint-stock company, an unincorporated association, or another entity that: (A) may sue and be sued; and (B) exercises practices that are compelled or limited by a system of religious belief held by: (i) an individual; or (ii) the individuals; who have control and substantial ownership of the entity, regardless of whether the entity is organized and operated for profit or nonprofit purposes.

Sec. 8. (a) Except as provided in subsection (b), a governmental entity may not substantially burden a person's exercise of religion, even if the burden results from a rule of general applicability. (b) A governmental entity may substantially burden a person's exercise of religion only if the governmental entity demonstrates that application of the burden to the person: (1) is in furtherance of a compelling governmental interest; and (2) is the least restrictive means of furthering that compelling governmental interest.

Sec. 9. A person whose exercise of religion has been substantially burdened, or is likely to be substantially burdened, by a violation of this chapter may assert the violation or impending violation as a claim or defense in a judicial or administrative proceeding, regardless of whether the state or any other governmental entity is a party to the proceeding. If the relevant governmental entity is not a party to the proceeding, the governmental entity has an unconditional right to intervene in order to respond to the person's invocation of this chapter.

Sec. 10. (a) If a court or other tribunal in which a violation of this chapter is asserted in conformity with section 9 of this chapter determines that: (1) the person's exercise of religion has been substantially burdened, or is likely to be substantially burdened; and (2) the governmental entity imposing the burden has not demonstrated that application of the burden to the person: (A) is in furtherance of a compelling governmental interest; and (B) is the least restrictive means of furthering that compelling governmental interest; the court or other tribunal shall allow a defense against any party and shall grant appropriate relief against the governmental entity. (b) Relief against the governmental entity may include any of the following: (1) Declaratory relief or an injunction or mandate that prevents, restrains, corrects, or abates the violation of this chapter. (2) Compensatory damages. (c) In the appropriate case,the court or other tribunal also may award all or part of the costs of litigation, including reasonable attorney's fees, to a person that prevails against the governmental entity under this chapter.

Sec. 11. This chapter is not intended to, and shall not be construed or interpreted to, create a claim or private cause of action against any private employer by any applicant, employee, or former employee.

"This is the End" with Seth Rogen and James Franco (2013)

Get ready for one of the most off beat disaster films you will ever see. The film is something like a Cheech and Chong film crossed with “Animal House.” You might say the film is juvenile in nature and be right, but it sure is funny, in a belly laugh type of way.

Two friends meet in L.A. after a year apart with plans to party the time away. One is a rising star in the movie industry, eager to show his old friend the collection of writers and stars that comprise his new world. While at a party with all the ritzy set they go out and see the world is ending.

Spaceships, explosions, people being sucked up into the sky; everything which you can imagine in the worst low budget Hollywood disaster film is assembled here. And with great comic effect as the two go back to the party to warn their friends, only to be rebuffed by these materially possessed people. When they finally realize that the two are not kidding, it is too late.

As the world about them crumbles and goes up in flames the two are separated, with one going up and the other going down to the pits of hell. As they struggle to hold onto one another they are forced to make a decision; let go and save one of them, or be dragged down together.

They choose to say goodbye and as one is sucked upward into the light the beast below swallows his friend, belching fire. But then, just as with Jonah and the Whale, his friend is regurgitated form the belly of the beast; cast upward towards his friend in a shaft of light.

When the two are last seen they are spiraling upwards towards heaven and the light, presumably towards the great party in the sky. This is a very strange film, but funny as hell. Let me know if there is any deeper meaning to it, other than the analogy of Jonah and the Whale.

"Sip A Little Tea with Goldie" - Smothers Brothers Show (1968)

One of the most forgotten segments of the Smother’s Brothers Comedy Hour was the weekly “Sip a Little Tea with Goldie” skit. This short video explains just how the chance encounter between an audience member, “Goldie O’Keefe”, occurred and how it affected the show as well as comedy in general. Some of her double entendre weather reports actually pre-date George Carlin’s “Hippie Dippie Weatherman” bit by almost a year.

Not much to explain about this video- its humor is self-evident and the topics are all relevant to the times when the skit was done, during the height of the “Summer of Love” and the War in Vietnam. The Smothers Brothers were only on for a few years, battling the CBS censors the entire time. 

The Smother's Brothers; along with the edgy artists they presented; pushed the boundaries of “acceptable” television, paving the way for shows such as “Saturday Night Live” in the 1970’s. Even contemporary comedians Jon Stewart and Steve Colbert owe a huge debt to these two brothers and the debt they paid to pave the way for more open political humor and satirical art.

Prohibition Ends - Looking Back to See Forward

They say the only thing new is the history that you don’t know. Well, here’s a bit of history which will serve to jog the memories of even the most die-hard defenders of this country’s draconian and useless War on Drugs. Within the first minute of this video, then Governor of New York; Al Smith; sums it up dramatically when he states  his hopes,  that in the future generations, “no such matter as this is ever again made the subject of federal constitutional law.” That’s a pretty strong statement, and begs the question of how did we let it happen again with reference to marijuana?

Most Americans think that the Volstead Act ended on New Year’s Eve of 1933 going on ‘34.  But the repeal of the 18^th Amendment by the 21^st, was actually signed by President Roosevelt on March 22, 1933 with a stated date of December 5, 1933 for the repeal to actually take effect. People were looking forward to a very legal Happy New Year for the first time in more than a decade.

But what happened to marijuana? Up until the Food and Drug Act of 1933; which came along just as alcohol was coming back; marijuana was legal. It was the staple of musicians everywhere, and had been openly smoked for years during the 1920’s. But, just as the Volstead Act came to a close, the new Prohibition began. And replacing the gangsters of old; with their drive by shootings and gambling casinos; we were ushered into a new age of Prohibition on marijuana.

There were no more drive by shootings; that didn’t happen until the cocaine and heroin epidemic hit the country in the late 20^th Century. Those two drugs were the original target of the Food and Drug Act. They are narcotics; that is, they produce narcoleptic effects in the user. Marijuana works in a totally different way on the mind and body, and should never have been included in the Food and Drug Act in the first place. So, why was it?

The answer to that can also be found in the first minute of this film as they speak of the half a million jobs which will be created by the repeal of the Volstead Act. Nobody wanted to put a dent into creating any jobs in the alcohol industry. We were in the midst of a Great Depression, and every job counted. The incorrect perception of marijuana smokers sitting around idly; without buying any liquor; was a threat to the plan to put America back to work.

Fast forward almost 80 years later and what do we see? We see the same history repeating itself over again. The War on Drugs clearly does not work. The country needs jobs. All of the same ingredients which went into repealing the 18^th Amendment are in place once more. With so many states taking up the issue of legalization, it is my hope that 2013 will show some progress towards removing marijuana from the list of controlled substances nation-wide. Aside from the jobs which will be created from the smoking of marijuana, think of all of the other uses for the by-products of the plant. They range from plastics and epoxies, to clothing and even bio-fuels. And the taxes alone would amount to a tidy sum that could be ear-marked to reduce our staggering $16 trillion debt. Think of it – puffing patriotically on the 4^th of July to save America. Ah, pipe dreams…..

Jamie Brockett - "The Legend of the Titanic" (1970)

This is the full version of a song which I haven't heard since it's re-release on Capitol Records in 1970. It was originally recorded for Oracle Records. I was going to do a serious post on the Titanic, the sinking of which, coupled with my father's service in the Navy, lead me to go to sea. I first heard this song on a late night FM station. I believe it was on Alison Steele's show, "The Night Bird", which aired on WNEW-FM from 2 AM until 6 AM daily. When the station found out that she was the #1 late night DJ, they switched her hours. She left the station in 1979. Ms. Steele is a member of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland.

The song is a totally re-invented version of the events concerning the Titanic. The song has the Titanic sailing from New York to London, which is, of course, incorrect. The reference to the Wright Brothers having not been to Kitty Hawk yet is also wrong, although no one had yet flown across the Atlantic. But the song is really a social protest song about class distinction, something which was very real aboard the Titanic on the night she went down. Listen to the verse about the color of the tickets and you will see what I mean. Also, pay attention for the hemp factory in Mexico and the 497 feet of rope which the First Mate takes aboard for his journey to England.

Jamie Brockett's career as a folk artist was most likely destroyed by this song. We have all heard of "one hit" artists before, but surely Mr. Brockett's 13 minute rendition of this song takes the prize for the longest of the genre. It was the only song on his debut album to chart, and he was forever plagued to perform this song wherever he went.

The cultural references in the song are abundant and colorful. The whole story centers on the world champion boxer Jack Johnson, who wants to travel to England for a fight, and attempts to board the Titanic for his journey. His ticket is the wrong "color", and so he is left behind, on the pier, fishing. Although some may find this ballad to be "politically incorrect" by today's standards, I still find this song entertaining, with much to say about social values. Ironically, this song about the "unsinkable" Titanic may have "torpedoed" Jamie Brockett's career as a more serious singer/songwriter.

"The Legend of the Titanic" by Jamie Brockett

It was back around the turn of the centuries, back around nineteen hundred and thirteen. There was a negro pugilist his name was Jack Johnson.

Now old Jack Johnson he was the toughest man in the whole wide world. He used walk around whoppin' people up side the head 'n makin' all sorts of money.

Like I say ol' Jack Johnson he was a pugilist. He was a pugilist by preference and by profession. And one day ol' Jack came walkin' on down by the pierside. He's just walkin on down. His manager come walkin' on down by the pierside. He says, "Uh, hi, Jack!"
He says, "Hi, manager!"
He says, "Whatcha doin'?"
He says, "I'm just walkin' on down by the pierside."

He says, "What's up?"
He says, "I gotta gig for ya."
He says, "Ya gotta gig for me?"
He says, "That's right."
He says, "Where abouts?"
He says, "Over in England."
He says, "Hmm... what'm I gonna do over there?"
He says, "Well, you goin' up n' whop this guy up side the head n' make all sorts of money."

Ol' Jack says, "That's groovy, baby! That's really groovy! You give me a ticket on the next flight out!"

He said, "Ticket on the next flight out?!? This is nineteen hundred n' thirteen. Why, the Wright brothers haven't even started foolin' around with Kitty Hawk yet!"

He said, "Uhh...who's she?"

It was midnight on the sea
the band was playing "Nearer My God To Thee".
Fare thee well, Titanic, fare thee well.

Ol' Jack says, "Well, how'm I gonna get there baby?"
N' he says "Ohhh, I'm gonna show ya" and he whips open a newspaper n' shows him a picture of the USS Titanic, folks. She's the world's biggest ship. She's made outta good wood and good iron. They said she'd never go down.

He says, "You mean I'm goin' over on the boat!"

N' he says, "That's right, baby; you're goin on the boat!"

N' he says, "Well, let's go get some tickets!" So they head on down to the ticket taker's place.

He walks on up to the ticket taker. He walks on in n' he says, "Hey, man, I wanna buy me some tickets!"

He said, "Gotta red ticket, green ticket, yellow ticket, blue ticket...what kinda ticket you want?"

He says, "I wanna red one!"

He gave him some loot n' he laid it on him.

So here's ol' Jack, he's got his ticket now. He takes everything he owns, he wraps it on up in a diaper n' he hangs it on a stick over his back n' goes headin' on down by the pierside.

He gettin' on down by the pierside, his manager's down there by the pierside, n' here she is folks - the USS Titanic! She's lined up beside two hundred n' fifty parkin' meters n' the Captain's gettin' done ready to split 'cause he run outta dimes.

Now around this time there was an Italian senator n' the state house n'...all Italian senators done got brothers own construction companies n'...this one had a brother he owned a construction company n'...the Titanic she was made outta good Italian wood, good Italian iron. They said she'd never go down.

So there's ol' Jack standin' on the bottom, got everything he owns wrapped on up in that diaper hangin' on a stick over his back. He shakes hands with his manager, goes walkin' on up the gangplank. The Captain standin' on the top. He get up onto the top n' the Captain, he look at the ticket...

He look at the ticket, he look at Jack, he look at the ticket, he look at Jack, he look at the ticket, he look at Jack, he look at the ticket, he look at Jack, lookita...

He says, "Sorry, baby, wrong color!"

He says, "Me or the ticket?!"

N' he says, "You!"

Now he wouldn't let Jack Johnson on board
They said "This ship don't haul no coal!"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.

It was midnight on the sea,
The band was playin' "Nearer My God To Thee"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.

So Jack says, "It's all right baby. It's all right. I'm gonna sit right here on the pier and watch you go right on down!"

(brief guitar solo)

So the Titanic, she sails on out into the North sea. She's out there floatin' around in and out between the icebergs n' ol' Jack's standin' on the pier.

I'm gonna tell ya 'bout the people on the Titanic now.

First of all there's a whole bunch of Jewish people from Miami. They're jumpin' up n' down, they're laughin', they're drinkin' booze, they're tradin' wives n' Cadillacs n' diamonds n' havin' all sorts of good clean party fun.

Then there was the people that run the boat. Now the people that run the boat, they know all about runnin' boats. They know all about hoistin' up land lubbers n' battenin' down hatches n' doin' all sorts of other good things like..."all good sailors do in the far away at sea".

Then there was the Captain. Now the Captain, he knows how to walk like a captain, write like a captain, walk like a captain, talk like a captain, smell like a captain, eat like a captain, do all sorts of captain things.

Then there was the first mate. Now I gotta tell ya bout the first mate. Now the first mate, he don't know nothin' about Jewish parties. He don't know nothing about hoistin' up land lubbers. He don't know nothin' about captains. He, uh, he wants to go on over to England he wants to play his guitar. He wanna run around n' chase women n' have all sorts of good...times.

Anyways this fella', his sideburns they're just a little too long. He giving way, see. He...he been down in Mexico. He been down in Mexico. He been workin' in this rope factory down in Mexico now. Down in Mexico they make rope outta this funny little hemp plant that grows wild in the ground (some of you people... grow it in flower pots under your bed)...ehh, anyways, he's down there and he's...he's makin' rope outta this funny marijuana plant. One day the rope factory, she catch fire n' he runs back on in to save his lunch - he's got two sardine sandwiches - runnin' back on in to save his lunch. He gets inside n' there's all this funny smoke floatin' around up inside n'...he gets some of this funny smoke up inside his head n'...he sit down in the middle o' de' fire n' he say,

"Shhhhhhhhhhh*t, baby, I ain't gonna make rope no more!!!"

So he takes everything he owns. He wraps it up on into a diaper and a knapsack too n' he...he headin' on to the Titanic he gets to the Titanic. He standin' on the bottom walkin' on up the gang plank n' the Captain's standin' on the top n' the Captain says, "What you got boy?"

He says, "I'm comin' on!"

He says, "WHAT YOU GOT!"

He says, "Well, I got me two changes of BVD's. I got me my guitar. I got me my address book, a... pair of socks, four Masked Marvel comic books, a tennis racquet...and four hundred n' ninety-seven n' a half feet o' rope."

He says, "Four hundred n' ninety seven n' a half feet o' rope! Whadaya got that for?"

He says, "I just carry it."

So he says, "it's all right. Go on board, go on board." And he did.

It was midnight on the sea,
The band was playin' "Nearer My God To Thee"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.

Now he wouldn't let Jack Johnson on board
They said "This ship don't haul no coal!"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.

That brings us up to what's happenin' now. The Titanic, she's floatin' around in and out between the icebergs, the Jewish people they partyin', they tradin' wives n' Cadillacs n' diamonds, they drinkin' booze n' havin' all sorts of party fun...

Everybody else is hoistin' up land lubbers n' battenin' down hatches...the First Mate he's hangin' over the rail, he's havin' himself a little smoke... he's diggin' the icebergs. Havin' himself a little smoke n' it's the Captain's time to do his thing. The Captain comes on out (remember I told you about the captain - he knows how to walk like captain, write like captain, talk like... all sorts of captain things). He comes on out n' he's standin' now. His thing right now is that he's gotta go out n' test the wind. So he casts his nose up into the north wind n' he goes...

(sniffs several times)

He walks on over to the First Mate. He says, "Hey, First Mate, what's that you smokin'?!"

He says, "That ain't nothin' but a little ol' cigarette, Captain."

N' he says, "I don't believe it! Gimme a puff!"

n' he says, "Alright...."

So the captain takes himself a little puff. Nothin' happened right away. He says, "It's alright, it's alright. It's just a cigarette. I'm goin' for a walk." And that's what he did, folks. He went for a walk. He went...he went out walkin' around the boat, he went walkin' toward the wheelhouse he...he walked around.

(tempo slows severely)

He walked around the wheelhouse once.......

He walked around the wheelhouse twice.......

On the third time around the wheelhouse.......

The First Mate he looked on over at the Captain n'.......

N' he say,.......

"You wanna 'nother toke, Captain?"......

And the Captain, he say,.......

"RIGHT!!!!!!!!"

(tempo returns to normal)

So, this time, he's gonna tell the captain a little bit about this smoke that he's smokin'. He says, "Now the idea, Captain, the idea is to get this smoke way down deep inside your tummy n' hold it there just as long as you can! It'll make you head feel good all inside."

So the Captain says, "Alright."

He takes himself three big tokes off that funny little brown weed n' he says, "I am commencing to hold it in!!"

He walked around the wheelhouse. He went downstairs. He laid down. He get up. He ran in the other room. He sent a radiogram. He came on back in. He took a shower. He come out. He shaved. He laid down. He got up again. He turned on the television. He turned off the radio. He played a game of cribbage. He read his Masked Marvel comic book. He walked thru the kitchen, made a cup of tea, made a cup of coffee, sat down, ate a piece of pie, went upstairs, played another game of cribbage, went back in, finished his other Masked Marvel comic book, Laid down, he had the television, the radio, the egg beater, the air conditioner n'everything's all goin' at once.
He walks up on deck and this is fifty-two minutes later n' this cat ain't breathed yet!!

So the First Mate see him standin' up there on the rail. He's all puffed up like a balloon! He says, "Ya gotta let it out, Captain!

So the Captain he let it all out at once.

Fallin' right down on the wheelhouse floor. He's out cold.

O-h-h-h, this just brings us up to what's happenin' again, folks. The Titanic, she's sailin' around in between the icebergs. Everybody else is havin' parties. The Jewish people they jumpin' up n' down, they tradin' wives n' Cadillacs n' diamonds n' drinkin' booze. Everybody else is hoistin' up land lubbers, battenin' down hatches n' doin' sail things. The First Mate's hangin' over there on the rail havin' himself a little smoke n' diggin' icebergs. And the Captain's out cold on the wheelhouse floor!

It was midnight on the sea,
The band was playin' "Nearer My God To Thee"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.

Now he wouldn't let Jack Johnson on board
They said "This ship don't haul no coal!"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.

All of a sudden.... the Captain's eyes popped wi-i-i-i-i-i-i-ide open.
He stood right up straight.....
Grabs a hold o' de wheel....
Looks on out at the bow o' dat boat n' he say,
"I'M GONNA MOVE YOU BABYYYYYYYYY!!!!!"

And he did, right on into an iceberg n' she went right on down!

It was midnight on the sea,
The band was playin' "Nearer My God To Thee"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.

Now he wouldn't let Jack Johnson on board
They said "This ship don't haul no coal!"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.

That's the true story of the Titanic, folks. She went right to the bottom. She took with her all the Jewish people, all the First Mates. She took with him the Captain. She took with him the land lubbers. She took with him the Masked Marvel comic books, the tennis racquet and four hundred n' ninety-seven n' a half feet o' rope!

Meanwhile back on the stateside, ol' Jack Johnson...why, he's standin' up on the pier he's fishin' away; he's got himself a little stick n' a line n' he gets a tug. He pulls it on up n' it's a big, wet, blue soggy mess n' on the inside on the lining written in big gold letters it says "USS Titanic" and stuck right above it was a wet roach!

That boy was so happy, he started doin' the eagle rock up n' down that pier like it's goin' outta style! He go...he gonna do the eagle rock now! Everybody in for the eagle rock!

Oh rock!

It was midnight on the sea,
The band was playin' "Nearer My God To Thee"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.

Now he wouldn't let Jack Johnson on board
They said "This ship don't haul no coal!"
Fare thee well Titanic, fare thee well.
Fare thee well Titanic goin down!

"A/K/A Tommy Chong" A Documentary by Josh Gilbert

In 2003, as the George Bush Administration was invading Iraq, an even more sinister scenario was taking place, largely unnoticed, here at home.

Thomas B. Kin Chong, aka Tommy Chong, half of the legendary comedy duo Cheech and Chong, was arrested and charged with selling "bongs" through the mail. On September 12th, 2003 Mr. Chong was sentenced to 9 months in Federal Prison and forfeited over $103,000 in cash and all of the merchandise that had been taken during the February 24th, 2003 raid.

The United States government had targeted him with an operation named "Pipe Dreams" which was aimed at Mr. Chongs mail order business Nice Dreams. US Attorney Mary Beth Buchanan prosecuted the case against the actor-director-comedian. Part of her argument against Mr. Chong was based on his "career of glamorizing pot smoking." When asked if Community Service would be an option for sentencing, Mr. Chong, who had no prior convictions, and his defense team were met with a perfunctory "No." The same answer applied to detention at a halfway house. Dangerous criminals such as Mr. Chong clearly need to be incarcerated.

Josh Gilbert, an associate of Mr. Chong, has made a documentary about the arrest,trial and sentencing in this case. It is about 80 minutes long and features many luminary personalities such as Lou Adler, Jay Leno, Bill Maher and Cheech Marin.

The movie is not shown in too many theaters. If you are wondering why, then you do not know, as I did not, that as late as May 13th, 2008 in Newport, Kentucky the FBI was raiding a warehouse and confiscating 10,000 copies of the completed film "A/K/A Tommy Chong." The movie that the Government didn't want you to see has become the movie that the government doesn't want you to buy. I have just watched the trailer and I have to agree with Roger Ebert who said of the film, "You don't have to approve of drug use to be offended."

Tommy Chong was placed under a Federal "gag" order to keep silent about the arrest. Too many complicated First Amendment and Ninth Amendment issues to deal with. Too much light on this subject might expose the "man behind the curtain." At a time when we are supposedly fighting for freedom in 2 wars, do we really want too much examination of our own policies here at home?

John Ashcroft and Mary Beth Buchanan spent over $12 million of YOUR tax dollars to keep you from seeing this film. For a look at this film and more information about it go to the following link;

http://akatommychong.com/

The site will introduce you to the facts of the case and filmmaker Josh Gilbert. You can also order a copy for your private viewing. I wish to thank Mr. Gilbert for his "heads up" on this film. It is important to remember that this country was founded on certain principles. Artistic and political freedom are paramount to our continued existance as a free society. At a time when we are battling the enemies outside of our borders, we should not have to be concerned with fighting "the enemies within."

"Cheech and Chong-The Unauthorized Autobiography" by Tommy Chong

I never thought I would even read this book. It has stared at me from the shelves of several libraries for almost 2 years now and I have kept on passing it over. Couldn't be good. Couldn't be worth reading. Boy, was I wrong!

This is one of the most well written and entertaining autobiographies that I have read in quite awhile. If you are expecting, as I did, a rehashing of old Cheech and Chong bits, with not too much substance in between, forget this book. It's not for you.

But if you are looking for a true life story that spans the 1950's through the 1980's and takes you from Calgary, Vancouver to Detroit and the Second City Comedy days and then on to the rest of the world- this is your book.

Whatever preconceived notions you might have about Cheech and Chong need to be checked at the door before you begin to read. This is the story of Tommy Chong, a Chinese-Canadian-Black Man who plays jazz guitar. Turned on by a Chinese jazz musician to marijuana he begins a musical journey that leads him to the world wide fame he imagined while growing up.

Along the way he performs and tours with the Supremes, T. Bone Walker (the Blind Man Chittlin' skit comes from a memorable night when Mr. Chong shared a bill with him), The Temptations and Berry Gordy himself. He even mentors Joe Jackson when The Jackson Five receive their first contract from Motown. Along the way he jams in London with Jimi Hendrix on bass. This guy has really been around.

In 1967 he was a member of Bobby Taylor and the Vancouvers. They recorded for Gordy Records, a subsidiary of Motown. They had several minor hits, among them "Malinda" and "Does Your Mama Know About Me?" The latter was written by Tommy Chong.

By 1969 when he met Richard Cheech Marin, Tommy was on his third marraige. Rae Dawn Chong is his oldest daughter. Although some of the stories here do end up as the basis for the comedy duos sketches, the book is more a history of the changes taking place in show business during the early 1960's. Mr. Chong does an incredible job of relating the Canadian club scene of the era and how it came to cross with the American entertainment of the time.

Influenced by comedians such as Lenny Bruce and especially Redd Foxx, he begins to veer away from music and is drawn toward the comedy of Second City in Detroit and the comedy clubs of Los Angeles.

Tommy Chong was a Canadian trying to get into the United States and obtain a "Green Card" at the same time Richard Marin was trying to get into Canada to avoid the draft. Through a series of misadventures they meet in Canada in 1969. Mr. Chong is by this time an accomplished musician and an Improvisational Comedian. He is looking for someone to play off of when he meets Cheech.

After a few false starts things really take off for them. A meeting with Lou Adler at A&M Records lands them $1,000 apiece and a tape recorder to make demos with. Before the day was over they had recorded the first sketch of the album that would make them famous. By the next morning Lou Adler had the "Dave's Not Here" bit sent to every major radio station in the country. The phones were ringing off the hook with requests to play it again and again. "Big Bamboo" had arrived.

There is also a little mystery being played out in this book. In the beginning Mr. Chong recounts sitting in an airport with his wife Shelby when Cheech passes by. Mr. Chong makes no effort to greet him, wondering instead why he does not "have the urge to reach up and grab him, as I would have a few years before..... why did I just watch as he passed by? ...What caused the rift that has seperated us for more than 20 years?"

I'm no spoiler so you will have to read the book to find out the answer. As for me,this was such a good read that I'm going out to get a copy of Mr. Chongs first book, "The I Chong."