Find Me In the Middle

You'll find me in the middle
almost each and every time.
Right there in the bullseye
where there is no yours, or mine.
Yes, you'll find me in the center,
Almost each and every time.

The place which I inhabit
has no me or you,
and if I can't talk to us
then who can I talk to?
The place which I inhabit says
One and one's not really two.

Stop and think about it
and see if you agree,
there is no we in me or you,
'cause one and one ain't three.
It's why you'll find me in the middle,
just as plain as plain can be.

Wise Ould Owl

Wise ould owl;
beady eyes which seem to prowl.
A proud and quiet fowl;
who suffers not - the fool.

Wise ould owl
presiding with a scowl.
Would your verdict be so foul,
t'were you on the Dunce's stool?

The Squirrell Story - 2003

Story time. True. We lived in one house where we had squirrells in abundance and I decided to feed them all. "Bobby Peanuts" would forever be my name, and one long remembered by the squirrells as a Saint of sorts. Well, what do the say about the best laid plans, etc.....? I fear it to be true....

I bought 25 pound boxes of peanuts, raw. Put them by the sliding glass doors in the kitchen which opened to the porch and the woods. Every morning I would feed the squirrells, and they came by the score!

One morning I woke, went down to the kitchen and there they were, peeking in the door at the box of peanuts. I joked with Sue that this was cute. They were probably scheming on how to get in. What do they say about "many a thing said in jest, etc.....? Again, I fear it to be true.....

Fast forward a few weeks. I'm in bed, home from work and there  is a scampering in the attic. I realize it's the squirrells and I'm so happy! Like in the cartoons, a squirrell family safely in the attic for the winter. I slumber awhile, with a smile for my new housemates. What do they say about the best of intentions, etc....? And, once again, I'm about to find out just how true these sayings are....

Another fast forward, about 3 weeks. Snow's gone, spring has sprung, but my winter guests have now become permanent residents in my home. One has even found it's way into the fireplace and hijinx ensue when I have to chase him out of the house, all the while looking at the confusion in his innocent looking but beady little eyes.

It was at that moment I knew that they were working their way through the house, trying to find their way to the peanuts! Plus,by now Sue is aware that squirrells are chewing through walls, wires, etc., destroying our home for the sake of 25 pounds of peanuts. As the one who brought them into our home, I was now in charge of evicting them.

So, I contact a humane, live animal removal service to do the heartbreaking work for me. I'm figuring on bait trap cages, carry them out and set them free. Still another old saying about no good deed going unpunished is about to be poven true......

After 2 weeks we have not caught a single squirrell, and they're still coming and going from the trees to the roof and into the attic. So,the humane animal control guy sets up a trap to prevent them coming in anymore.

The very first night a squirrell is trapped by his tail and left hanging upside down to die. I call the animal removal guy and he says to leave it hang there for a week so the other squirrells get the message.

Now, our house looked something like the gates to the city of London around 1450. They used to leave the corpses of recently impaled, or otherwise similarly executed persons, hanging there as a warning to other would be knaves. Only this time it was for the squirrells!

The whole thing came to an end when we had a carpenter and roofer come over to recap the screens on the chimney and repair all the damage they had done inside the attic. And of course I was forced to stop feeding the squirrells.....

Rocky

My world is pretty small these days. Still, I manage to have some amazing things happen to me in this reduced sphere. Take the squirrels as an example.

We moved in here 1 year ago this week. In that  time we've  had deer and all kinds of birds. Then came the squirrels. And of course I have to feed them. And then I need to have one eat from my hand, Central Park style. It took over 8 months but I did it.

One now eats from my hand daily. Just wraps his lips around the peanut and we both let go at the same time. He doesn't tug at all, and never uses his teeth. It's a wonderful feeling of connection as we look right into one another's eyes. They don't  carry rabies so you're risking only a nip.

Now that was cool enough but today he slipped and his paw touched my finger as he got his nut, and we both just looked at one another and then he left. Came back about 4 PM and this time I held my finger out and he took it while he got the nut. It's such a cool feeling because these ain't New York squirrells. Such a light  touch, I can see how he gets around so quickly. Pretty cool , huh?

Sue was there and almost got a picture. We'll keep trying!

Zeus and Hermes

Zeus and Hermes came disguised as ordinary peasants, and began asking the people of the town for a place to sleep that night. They had been rejected by all, "so wicked were the people of that land," when at last they came to Baucis and Philemon's simple rustic cottage. Though the couple was poor, their generosity far surpassed that of their rich neighbors, among whom the gods found “doors bolted and no word of kindness."

After serving the two guests food and wine (which Ovid depicts with pleasure in the details), Baucis noticed that, although she had refilled her guest's beech wood cups many times, the pitcher was still full (from which derives the phrase "Hermes's Pitcher"). Realizing that her guests were gods, she and her husband "raised their hands in supplication and implored indulgence for their simple home and fare." Philemon thought of catching and killing the goose that guarded their house and making it into a meal, but when he went to do so, it ran to safety in Zeus's lap. Zeus said they need not slay the goose and that they should leave the town. This was because he was going to destroy the town and all those who had turned them away and not provided due hospitality. He told Baucis and Philemon to climb the mountain with him and Hermes and not to turn back until they reached the top.

After climbing to the summit ("as far as an arrow could shoot in one pull"), Baucis and Philemon looked back on their town and saw that it had been destroyed by a flood and that Zeus had turned their cottage into an ornate temple. The couple's wish to be guardians of the temple was granted. They also asked that when time came for one of them to die, that the other would die as well. Upon their death, the couple were changed into an intertwining pair of trees, one oak and one linden, standing in the deserted boggy terrain.

An Irish Tale

A man retires and moves to small village in Ireland. He finds the local pub and goes in every night. And he always orders three beers at the same time.

After a few weeks the publican says to him, "I can pour them fresh, separately each time and they will taste better."

The man says, "No, this is a family tradition. I have two brothers and whenever we drink, even if we're alone we drink together. And I guarantee you wherever they are tonight if they're drinking they're doing the same." The pulican says what a lovely tradition it is and things go on as usual for about 3 months.

One night the man walks in and orders only two beers. The word goes out to the village and though no one wants to ask the obvious question, anonymous flowers start arriving for him at the pub. The whole town appears to be in mourning, and the man finally asks what all the fuss is about.

The publican tells him, Well, we saw you're  only ordering  2 beers now, and if you wouldn't consider it prying, can we ask which brother has passed away?"

The man replies, "Oh, that? Me brothers are both fine. But I've given up the drink."

For Aliyah and Trinity

I wish I could show you the seashells 

lying along the shore.

I wish I could show you the oysters 

that lie on the ocean floors.

I'd love to show you the sunsets 

in all the parts of the world,

With all the sunrises and moonsets

and the way the stars shine, just as pearls.

I'd take you for rides on a moonbeam,

and have you home before dawn.

So, when you awaken to greet the new day,

the dream would be lost in a yawn.

But somehow you'll know that I've been there,

the day will feel extra bright.

And, knowing there's someone who really cares

will make all your burdens seem light.