"Plowing Your Furrows Crooked"

They just don’t make films like they used to; and some people are probably very happy about that. Count me in the minority. I love the old films; all of them. War films; romances; musicals; biographies; dramas; historical dramas; westerns; it makes no difference. They all seemed to have something to say and were a lot less noisy in saying it.

True story; I went to see the film “Pearl Harbor” a number of years ago when it came out. I was with my daughter. As we exited I heard an old guy with a Pearl Harbor Survivors cap on his head say to his wife, “I was there and it wasn't that loud!”

Well, it’s Sunday so I thought I’d post something spiritual; Walter Brennan pitching the Lord to Gary Cooper. Check out how Gary Cooper tries to get away as soon as Walter Brennan starts to talk about religion. I think we all do that to some extent. Shy away from things which threaten our “comfort zones.”

In this 3 minute scene, Walter Brennan; as the Pastor; tackles the questions which plague us all throughout life; Can we fight the evil within ourselves? Will God actually help us? (Love it when Gary Cooper says he sure wishes the Lord would “throw in” with him.) And are we too weak to overcome ourselves and our own shortcomings; let alone Satan? Big questions, all. This is what I love about old films.

George Carlin - On Religion

If you are very serious about your religion, then do not hit start on this George Carlin bit, it will only offend you. I usually post a religious piece on Sunday; music or something at least family related. This routine by Mr. Carlin in no way reflects my own religious views at all; but I like to think of this as sort of a variety day on my blog. At any rate, God is probably strong enough to take this in good humor, if not; then George Carlin; and possibly myself; are both in trouble!

I’m posting this because I think it’s funny and illustrates the difference between our American culture and that of the Middle East. If George Carlin had ever done a bit like this about Islam, his head would've been on a pike. I’m probably going do a couple of these posts, featuring comedians such as ex-pastor Sam Kinnison with his hysterical piece about why Jesus was never married and why he’s not coming back. I don’t necessarily agree with these performers in every aspect; actually I am an ardent believer in God; but I do find this sort of humor to be funny. And, once again, if you don't, then please do not hit that start button!

In addition, I felt that since I have posted so much religious themed stuff on Sundays, it was time to give the pagans a shot. If anyone is offended by this type of humor, please do not watch this; I would hate to lose anyone of the people who drop in here. 

A Sunday Sermon - "The Bishop's Ass"

I thought I’d skip the usual Sunday post this week in exchange for an old joke and an even older lesson. Humor can convey the most important of the things we learn in life. All you have to do is listen, and maybe laugh a bit at yourself. The illustration above is by Norman Rockwell and is titled "Walking to Church." It was done in 1953.

A pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again. The local newspaper read:

“PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT”

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race. The next day, the local newspaper headline read:

“BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS”

This was too much for the bishop so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent. The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:

“NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN”

The bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10. The next day the paper read:

“NUN SELLS HER ASS FOR $10”

This was too much for the bishop. So, he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild. The next day the headlines read:

“NUN ANNOUNCES -  ASS IS WILD AND FREE”

The bishop was buried the next day. And, the moral of the story is; being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery, and even shorten your life.

So be yourself and enjoy life. Only worry about your own ass, not someone else's. You'll be a lot happier and live longer.

Karl Malden in "On the Waterfront"

In one of the most poignant scenes from the film “On the Waterfront”, Karl Malden delivers one of the all-time great sermons ever captured on screen. Father Barry, portrayed by Malden in the film, has taken an oath to stand by one of the men who has agreed to testify against the mobsters who control the waterfront. When that man is killed Father Barry steps up to the plate and tells the truth about the corruption that mires the world all around him.

In the 6 decades since this film was released many things have changed. Technologically we have eclipsed some of our wildest dreams, yet there is still a vacant spot in our hearts and souls. And the problems always come back to the same point of origin; greed and vanity. 

That’s right, vanity. For what can be more vain than to think that your life; your needs, your desires; are more worthy of fulfillment than another’s? Until you can answer that question honestly, and without prevarication, then we will never grow to our true height as a civilized society.